FEAR AND LOATHING IN NEW HAW
i get housing benefit. there, i’ve said it now. it fills me with shame to admit it because i am a middle-class boy; yet i would say, in mitigation, that i have never claimed benefit until last christmas. but i’m entitled to it, so i’m claiming it.
when i say that i get housing benefit i mean, of course, that my landlord gets my housing benefit. i never see a penny of it. like all housing costs it is wildly inflated, and all to line the pockets of the buy-to-let merchants (like our unbeloved mr bliar).
this morning i got a phone call from my landlord. he was going to have me evicted. he was going to have me evicted from my home because the council had not sent him loads of money. i did not want to be evicted and i felt the cold knot of fear tightening in my stomach. he said that the council lining his pockets was my responsibilty. i did not mention his responsibilties; the kitchen tap that has never worked properly, the mandatory CO testing of the gas appliances that should be certificated annually, the faulty electrics. i kept quiet because i was scared. scared and vulnerable. because i did not want to come home from tesco and find the locks changed and my pathetic belongings outside in the rain.
the civic offices are in addlestone. this sorry place is quite a long walk from where i live; i know this because i haven’t got a car and public transport around here is arse so i have had to walk there quite a few times in order to facilitate the enlineification of the landlordly pockets. but i did not want to be evicted so i walked there again. right into a brick wall of incompetence.
it transpired that the impoverished landlord has not been able to buy a golden wheelbarrow to carry his rubies around in because someone at the council had been sending all that money to the wrong address. no one would help me. it was obvious that, as it was friday, like all good local government officers they all wanted to go home at lunchtime. i told them that i was going to be evicted but nobody helped me at all. but, to be fair, they did offer some fairly sincere apologies.
being on benefit is not funny. i get less a week than some people spend on keeping a dog but the landlord doesn’t go short. oh no. yet it is me who has to waste money on phone calls and traipse back and forth in the pouring rain getting all the bits and pieces of paper that they demand to see and then someone there makes such a cock-up that i am threatened with eviction. my flat isn’t up to much (ask merman) but it is quiet and safe and, do you know?, i just can’t cope with things that grown-up people are supposed to be able to cope with. i’m ill. i might not look it, but i am.
i walked back from addlestone and got bread from the shop. they also sell swig but i only bought two cans. some canal therapy was called for so i walked the rest of the way along the towpath and fed bread to the ducks.
and all the while, the icy knot of fear twisted in my guts.
grub stats: home-made bag spol
stats stats: sick of stats
hatred of people that make money out of other people stats: extreme
ho hum, dear reader, ho hum.
Comments
| actually it wasn’t as bad as i wrote it. |
| We ought to club together and buy you a muck-spreader so you can visit a) your evil bastard lanlord (sounds like my last one) and b) your local council office. Bah! Poo to Bliar, Poo to money-grabbing-bastard-landlords and Poo to benefit-office-staff! Comment by Omally — 13/3/2004 at 9:50 am |
| Yeah, what Omally said. I guess it won’t mean much, Henry, given your posting about God not existing the other night, but I’m praying for you. Paul Comment by Paul G0TLG — 13/3/2004 at 10:21 am |
| :-( Hope everything turns out okay for you Henry. |
| Henry - I used to work for the housing department *shudder*, and found that the law is on the side of the tenant, so I shouldn’t worry too much about it all. At the end of the day, you’ve not done anything wrong. Chin-up old chap, the sun is shining so nothing bad can happen |
| Yes, turn the other cheek, Henry. |
| Yeah. Boo! and Hiss! to Landlords and Housing Benefit Departments. All you hav to do to avoid eviction, dear Henners, is Not Move Out. Comment by Maris Piper — 13/3/2004 at 12:50 pm |
| I wanted to post a message earlier, Henners old boy, but I couldn’t find the words I was looking for.* It appears to me that if your evil landlord personage did decide to do the unthinkable, you’d have a wealth of support in the form of all us thingers. *Mostly because of a hangover Comment by Kouros — 13/3/2004 at 2:01 pm |
| Landlords are horrid. Little pocket Hitlers with more power than is good for them. All strength to you, Henners. Comment by JG — 13/3/2004 at 2:04 pm |
| Stay strong, matey. You’ve got people here who love tracking down obscure facts (like rights, for instance). You’ve got people who’ve worked for the Housing Department, and know The Law. Most of all, you’ve got people who think you’re rather wonderful, and care quite a bit about your well-being. Maybe this is twee, but, what the fegg, have a virtual hug, H. Comment by prvincent — 13/3/2004 at 3:49 pm |
| Hang on in there Henry. There’s a lot of people that care about you. The landlord’s a s**t and the benefit people deserve a small thermo-nuclear device up their backsides. I hope it all works out for you. ned Comment by ned — 13/3/2004 at 5:27 pm |
| Henry, Cheer up. It’s not over til it’s over. Comment by Mort\’s Mom — 13/3/2004 at 5:29 pm |
| You are wrong Henry, your flat is up to much. Landlords are scumbags and the justification for that is that they are all driven by greed to get rich at another persons expense. I am thinking about you matey. Comment by the merman — 13/3/2004 at 6:22 pm |
| Like Kouros, I didn’t know what to say earlier. Unlike Kouros, I still don’t really know what to say. Apart from: a) That sucks. :o) Comment by Stu — 13/3/2004 at 8:11 pm |
